Christmas is over

Christmas is over - I am about 12 stone heavier than I was prior to Christmas. That means my work of over eating is done and time to start the New Year!! :D

Some highlights of Christmas - got some awesome gifts (a years couples membership to the National Trust, a new Regatta coat, some good walking shoes, welly boot socks, a smart coat for going out, two hampers, some books about wildlife and knitting, a DVD, a "Make your own owl doorstop kit", wine, a reminder list, sweets and chocolates, a board game called Settlers of Catan, a lovely big cardigan, bottle of baileys, some cookie cutters, a head massager, a Dove set, some piano music, an Amazon Kindle voucher... it goes on!)

As you can tell, despite the fact that there was only the three of us (humans, that is, not to exclude the two dogs, and the cat who also got presents) the tree was positively heaving underneath with the weight of presents!

Matt enjoyed opening his presents, as did I!!! :)

This week, then, we hope to go for a country walk (thanks to the National Trust App) which is already mapped out etc to start to use our membership. Once we've tested out how it all works, we'll be off! (hopefully) I am pretty excited as it's what we've been talking about doing for a while, and is certainly right up my street in terms of things I like to do. It'll be nice to do something that doesnt revolve around food, booze or gyms.

When I'm feeling braver and there's a little more light, I will be sorting out the horse riding too!

What else to tell you? I've been playing Syberia (point and click game) today - it is SO frustrating when you have no patience whatsoever. I will have to learn a bit!!

Matt has been playing Far Cry 3 continuously for some time, and finally finished it today. Unfortunately, he is now on to something with Zombies. I will be having nightmares again no doubt!

I've also started the post Christmas chores - lots of cleaning to be done. I used the turkey to make a nice stock and a turkey soup which we had for dinner earlier. Yum!! All gone now though :(

Might be time to try fodmap diet again - my IBS is back with avengence, as is usual whenever I eat things I shouldnt. Sigh.

Anyway, it is late and Matt has work tomorrow (tee hee, I dont!!) so I shall be disappearing shortly.

G out xxx

It's been a while....

It's Christmas eve today, so I thought I'd take the time to reflect on the year very briefly and talk a little about next year's mission.

2012... This time last year I was facing up to the fact that I really needed to do something about my weight. I did that but have recently slipped back due to an amazing holiday in Mexico. I wouldn't change this year, with the exception of one very sad event, so I have decided to be pleased with the overall weight loss and the fun times I had, and aim to do the same next year!!

The sad news was the passing of my Grandma. We all miss her terribly, and I am sure more so now it is Christmas. I miss her particularly for all the little things - not having our whittering chats every week, her sage advice, her boundless enthusiasm and support in everything I did. I still find myself wanting to tell her things (am often to found chattering to thin air in the vain hope she will hear) I think losing her and seeing what a good, kind, determined and yet humble and selfless lady she was to everyone, has had a profound impact on my thinking. I am determined that my own self doubt and fear will no longer have the upper hand in my decision making process. I wish I could thank her for everything she was to me.

So next year then. I will be putting health (back and body) first, and will be losing 20kg. (Don't panic, I will still be in healthy weight range) I have given up the gym, to be replaced with daily dog walks, cycling, and horse riding on a more regular basis. I want to do some jumping lessons after normal lessons. I will be going Euro camping, to several exciting weddings and Matt will be 30!!

So thank you for reading this year - more updates to follow, but in the meantime I wish everyone a happy Christmas and a joyous new year.

G out xxx

Carry On (Cue Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young)

http://youtu.be/nP0VBB7BO64 (sound track for this post)

I am in a fabulous mood today, I think primarily because we have had an unexpected day of sunshine, which has meant we have got everything that we needed to get done, done in a much quicker time than expected.

Now that we're back at home, and Matty is playing Kingdoms of Amalur: The Reckoning (I don't even really need to go in to mocking the overly elaborate title really, it's a bit too obvious!) It is the longest game ever, in the history of all mankind. FACT. Incredibly repetitive to watch too.
1 - Run.
2 - Meet badies.
3 - Kill badies.
4 - Have a discussion with a multicoloured wise bloke / woman.
5 - Run.
6 - Repeat ad infinitum.

I should go in to games reviewing... !!!

Anyway, I am also in a good mood, because I've lost again this week and I am now just 1.6kg from my overall target. I literally cannot believe it. It seems we have been doing it for SO long, and although I knew that, after a few weeks, it was likely to be an attainable target, I dont know if I ever actually believed I would get to this stage. But here I am.

I still think of myself as the same size that I started at though, so it constantly amazes me when things don't fit or I have to go down a size. So today I dug out the picture that was 50% responsible for my post-Christmas weight related meltdown, and got Matty to take one of me today. It's mostly to try to make myself see the actual progress, and it is surprising.

I am a little concerned that we'll go on holiday and that I will end up inadvertantly eating way too much, particularly as the emphasis is so much on rich / cheesy / alcoholic things, which means that it'll tot up the WW points really quickly! It has been so much hard work to lose the last 2 KG though that I think I'll have to keep myself on track! Either that or I'll be running for half the day!!!

Matt, incidently, is killing something on the Xbox at present. There are 2 more things to kill, and then no doubt he'll have to speak to a purple and yellow sage bloke, before running a bit further. Just thought I'd keep you updated.

For now then, I shall disappear and make our healthy dinner. Seeing as we're going out to Sheffield on Thursday for a curry with my old work colleagues, I have to save my extra points for then. The rest of the day will involve washing and ironing, so that we are ready to pack. For holiday. I literally cannot wait.

G out x

The best boyfriend in the world

I have just checked in to Matt and my flights for just over a week's time. I literally cannot wait, for the following reasons.

1 - It is one of the 2/3 times a year that I get to see my parents and my cat.
2 - I am SO ready for some sunshine (no pressure France, but y'all better have that yellow blob in the sky or else)
3 - I am really looking forward to some quality time with Matt, without the stresses of modern life / jobs / balancing acts trying to get in the way
4 - I'm looking forward to not having to sit in this twice every day for an hour each way.

5 - I am SO ready for a rest


When you consider Matt's job move and my changes to my job, a serious attack of back pain, and this week a seriously mean cold, we have had plenty to keep us busy / stressed lately.

We have also been on the Northern Meet drive for the weekend, and on a tour around Leeds last weekend.

Now the Tour. This is well worth a mention, because I thought it was the sweetest thing ever done for me. While we were out looking at the Olympic Torch, Matt realised just how much the local population coming together to see it meant to me (growing up in a small community means that community feel is very important to me, and I have seen little evidence of it so far, beyond our cracking neighbours) So he hatched a plan, which involved taking me in to Leeds on the bus, as a tour guide, and then taking me to various places in Leeds that I don't know, that he always talks about. We also went to the Museum which was great fun, had a lovely lunch together and then a relaxed evening. We purchased Widget (toy in picture). He's soooo cute.

Matt also included the purchase of this dress in our Tour - it is a size 12. Must be a large size 12, but nevertheless, it's worth recording as my first ever size 12 in anything.

The whole day was just great fun, so thank you Matty.

Shortly after I got sick, and then seriously grumpy.

Matt is away tonight, somewhere near Birmingham. Eating curry (lucky!!). I miss him lots. I even miss the Xbox. A little bit.

I could have spent all evening reflecting on how great it is to be able to be able to be positive for other people for once in my glass-half-empty life, which I have managed twice today. But I'm not in a focussed enough mood to be reflective, which I blame on the chest / head pain.

What I will say, is that shortly before I see my family or friends, it always hits home how much I miss them. But it is a testament to Matt's love and care and affection, that I do not feel that way 24/7.

So this blog is dedicated to the best boyfriend in the world. My Matty xxxxxxxxxxxxx

G is back....

So the laptop is finally fixed, and I can start to write my blog again.

Which is a relief, because I gained 0.8kg this week. I am NOT angry with myself about this, because on Friday last week when I woke up I was in agony, and have been taking medication all week to settle my bad back down. So no exercise and medicine, I can't be kicking myself.

It does mean, however, that there are now only 11 weeks left until my deadline of my birthday, and I still have 4kg to lose. That means that I have to get serious now. And that's bad timing, because I am going on holiday and have about 100 parties / weekends away coming up. Sigh.... I needed to be at target by the time I went out to France. Butt into gear time...

Our garden is up and running... it's lovely and has been a lot of hard work. Rather than talk you through it, I'll post some pics below.




















Today I have had a haircut and had my eyebrows threaded. I figured that we are so busy for the next few weeks that it would need doing early!

Next week is the Northern Meet with the BMW forum, which I am really looking forward to. I will hopefully have some photos to put up of the route / days out etc.

I have too much else to catch up with, so for now I will leave it at that, and we'll start again when Matty starts gaming again.

G out x

"Your browser is no longer supported by blogger!"

Grr....!!! It's so annoying when, for some unexplained reason, Blogger will not allowed the computer to let you write. Today, for some reason, it is working. Our laptop is currently away for repair, after nearly a year's service, it decided to go pop. So I am borrowing another, which hasnt liked my blogging!! Lots to catch up on.... Serious gardening.... we spent the whole day, dawn til dusk, gardening and laying a lawn. In further news, that lawn is now growing. Granted it's a little patchy, but it's a great start and I look forward to being able to use it either later in the summer or next year, to sit in the sun. Next to the lawn, Matt has constructed a massive raised bed for me to have a little kitchen garden, out of the leftover decking planks that we had kicking about. Around the other side of the house, we have deployed all of the stones that used to be where the new lawn is, so that it all looks a whole lot neater than it had done in the past. I had been running lots, but my hip started to play up and then my back. I've taken a break for a good many weeks from any form of strong running, and it has started to settle down now. I have also realised that my posture when running is awkward, leaning forward much more than I should and consequently putting strain on my low back / hips. So last night I went for a 4k run (jog, with some walking patches as I am less fit than I had been) and tried the new posture. Came home slightly sore, but nowhere near as bad as I have been! In weight loss news, Matt and I are still pushing on strongly. I have now lost a total of 15.1kg, and am just 3.5kg away from target. Matt is just 1.8kg away from his. We are both having major wardrobe issues now. In particular, I am struggling because I want to replace my old clothes, but at present the fashion is so hidious that I cannot really find anything that I particularly like. I'm sure that I will get there, and it is a small price to pay. I feel much better in myself. Last weekend we went to Bibi's for cocktails and then into Leeds for Mexican, to celibrate Ali's birthday. Had such a great night, really enjoyed myself and the company. Had friends over on Thursday for a curry cooked by Matt, which I really enjoyed. He didnt like the curry which is a shame, as it was one of my favourites! Light, tasty and didnt make me poorly!! Still feel like I'm struggling a little to settle myself in properly to Leeds, mostly just miss my closest friends and I don't suppose that will ever go away - Just need to make the time to see them more, either going back south or them coming up to me. I intend to organise a get together for some time August / Sept, so that I can try and get everyone in the same place. At least before I hit 30 anyway lol!!! Long bank holiday weekend this weekend, and I am so glad. BBQ tonight at Liz's, followed by a party tomorrow night. Then a little shopping, a little gardening and some reading, and I will be a happy bunny. G out x

BEST - DAY - EVER!!!

Today has turned into an awesome day.

Firstly, at weigh in today I reached over 2 stone loss (13.1kg in total so far) - fabulously pleased!

I also had a very happy and cheery Matty return home yesterday after his boys night, albeit slightly worse for wear.  As a result, I got to go shopping to the White Rose Centre this morning without any complaints.  I tried on a few things, all deliberately at size 14, and they all went on without a problem.  A couple of the dresses were a little tight on the bum, but nothing major.  In fact, the dresses were also a little baggy on my waist.

I managed to get some bargain work wear from Primark (shhhh, dont tell anyone) which I really like (see photo)

I also got a pair of jeans and a top in the debenhams sale.  (see photo) I have some clothes that actually fit again!!!

Secondly, SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY GOT PROMOTED!!!! Yey, back to the Championship for us after several years languishing in the League One.  Let's hope we can stay up next season!

And finally, I get to have a Chinese meal (nothing mad) tonight, which will be the first time in absolutely ages.  Can't wait!!!

G out x

Little surprises make it all worth while

It has been a little while since my last post.  I'd love to tell you that I've been out smashing it at the gym every day and that all has been well, but in actual fact it has been a struggle of the mind.

The past two weeks have been about buckling down and proving to myself that this magical 13stone barrier that I've created in mind is just that - a creation. 

I'm writing today in the knowledge that the magical barrier has been broken, as a result of two weeks of strict eating and gentle exercise.

Matt and I have both over achieved this week.  I am now only 2kg off the lightest I've been in my adult life, and I am definitely the slimmest I've been.  Matt is actually the lightest he has been in his adult life and is looking amazing for it.  I just can't get over the change in us both.  More importantly than anything, neither of us are obese anymore.  That, in itself, is a HUGE milestone. It means the start of a healthier life and hopefully as a result, a longer one together.

I have found that as a result of my weight change, my hormones are having a fit and so, fresh from a trip to the doctors last week, I hope that shortly that problem should come to an end.  It would be most welcome because the constant up / down cycle is taking its toll, and is troubling my psyche and as a result, having an impact on results.  The worse I feel, the more demons I have to battle not to stuff my face....!!

In the past two weeks, I have managed to lose 1.7kg and I hope this week that I will have a similar result.  I even earnt my 25lbs lost star this week.  Interestingly, I am starting to notice little surprises.  Things like a dress I bought ages ago to fit into now doesnt fit still, but because it's too big.  I have lost an inch pretty much all round again.  Matt bought me a pair of shorts from the supermarket on request, but bought a size 12 by accident.  I can actually get them on (although they look ridiculously tight and will be going back, the point is that before I might have got one leg into a size 12 waistband)  These are the things that help motivate me more than anything else.  Even the below pic, I noticed my glasses look bigger on my face (the kitty is too cute though!!)

I also have a Weightwatchers buddy now in Trace, who has just started her journey and who I hope loves it and is successful. 

I read a blog from a lady on weightwatchers today who was discussing her experience with a friend who was after a quick fix weight loss and was asked "How can you stand it?"  Her answer was a really good one.  She said that she can stand it because each day she wakes up feeling healthier, not tired and lethargic, and a different person to who she used to be.

I can't wait to get there.  I'm only 6.7kg off target now, which I hope to achieve in the next 8 - 10 weeks. 

This is the last push, and I know that it will be the hardest.  New target clothes have been purchased (Golddigga jeans, yo) - 75 kg, here we come.

G out x

Bring me sunshine, bring me laughter, bring me..... several extra pounds :(

It has been a while.

Since, I have been eating Easter treats / general treats.  I have gained again.

I could go in to a lot of how I feel, what has caused it etc but I am fairly down to say the least, so this is just a quick blog to remind myself to take everything one day at a time and that today I start again.  My next small target is to get below 80kg.  It will take me 6 weeks or so I reckon, but it gives me another short term goal.   

We had a lovely family meal at Easter in Southampton, and I got to see Grandma which was super!  She's just the best!!  This is us at Lepe.  Matty met Grandma, and the wider family too.  All around successful trip!

G out x

The jeans are defeated!!

So today I have managed to lose 1kg which puts me back to where I started in March.  A flat line month, but nevertheless I'm still continuing to lose an average of 0.5kg per week.  Just need to keep it on track now.  I am amazed, it has to be said, that I managed to lose anything this week at all!!

I have also managed to fit into my target jeans.  I bought these when I was last at my slimmest, back in 2006.  I have always kept them because once I'd got out of them I told myself that one day I'd get back into them.  I'm currenly sat comfortably in them, so I'm a happy bunny today!  All this hard work is paying off finally.  Here is the proof!!!

We are having a lazy-ish day today.  Mowing the lawn / dog poo-picking and washing should be our only chores.  We also have to walk up to Pets At Home to get various pet related requirements (food / toys) and then I believe our afternoon  will consist of the Leeds match and relaxing.  I will have time to get my Kindle out and ACTUALLY have some down time.  Oh God, I just can't wait!!  In the evening we're going to walk to a local curry house that we discovered whilst driving around trying to find a petrol station that had some fuel.  If it's a good curry house, it will be a real find.  It's the one thing that we think that we really miss around here.  We have East for booze, Via Verde and Salvos for Italian, two really good Thai restaurants, but no decent curry house.  Fingers crossed!!

I've been running a lot with Matt recently, and it has been to our benefit.  Road running in decent weather I think is preferable to the gym, but it seems to have caused an issue with my left hip (I am still heavy, and run fairly flat footed and with my cusomary strange gait) which I am now waiting to calm down.  I will continue at the gym as the treadmills are cushioned, but I hope it's not a future problem.  Just as I start to actually enjoy it.... lol!!

The most exciting thing that happened this week is that we booked our holiday to Mexico.  I have been thinking about this for ages now, ever since we started to look at Caribbean holidays.  In my mind, it is my 30th birthday present to myself and I didnt want my birthday to pass without doing something for myself.  I know that sounds selfish, but I've rarely really celebrated my birthday in the way that I've wanted to.  It will be between Matt and my birthday, so it will be just as much for his 30th as mine, but I think we'll have a great time... here is a teaser of the hotel....

Last thing then, I promised a picture of my horse riding treat once I had managed to get a hold of it, and now I have so here it is.  This is taken at the end of the ride, and I think you can see the genuine thrill in my face.  Liz's horse is HUGE as well, we hadnt really realised how much bigger she was than Moss.  I had such an ace time, and all I can think about is when I can go back.  Start to save up!

G out x

Good doggies!!!

A miracle has happened.  I thought that I'd share.

I came home from work today, on my own.  When I come home on my own, and this is without fail, the dogs have ALWAYS destroyed something of mine, or left poop for me to clean up.

Today, two smiley doggies were at the door, wagging their tails frantically.  We played in the garden a bit, and then I went in to face the music.  Downstairs.... nothing wrong.  Upstairs.....nothing wrong!!!!
HALLELUJAH!!!!!!

I have just been out to Sainsburys and to my weekly shop, I added some doggy bones for them.  They are currently happily munching away in bed!

So....  Matt's birthday went really well, everyone seemed to enjoy themselves and Matt certainly did which was the most important thing.  We had some lunch (including a giant pie, and giant calzones too) and then headed out to the beer festival.  The Bardsey Beer festival was good fun again this year, with two bands on show, 29 beers, and several ciders.  The setting was sunny and warm, and it was a real giggle.  We went out to East of Arcadia in the evening for a meal all together, which, for a change, was absolutely delicious!

I think that these are the photos that sum the day up the best!

It dawned on me that for Matt's birthday last year, I met all of Matt's friends (at once....scary!!) and that it's really only a year that I've had this life.  It seems SO much longer.  Made me realised how settled I actually feel!

Matt is away tonight, so I get to watch Supersize vs Super Skinny, and then Big Fat Gypsy Wedding without complaints.  But I do miss my Matty lots and I wish he was here with me!

G out x

Recipe for sharing...

Now this is a naughty recipe, but I discovered it this afternoon and I thought it was WELL worth sharing....

Bourbon Pecan Brownies

Makes about 16 squares or bars...

200g dark chocolate
125g butter
2 eggs
125g light brown sugar
100g caster sugar
75ml bourbon whiskey
2tsps vanilla extract
175g plain flour
1 tbsp cocoa
125g pecan nuts, roughly chopped.

Heat the overn to 190c / gas 5 and line a 20cm square cake tine with foil.  Melt the chocolate with the butter in a saucepan and leave somewhere warm on the work surface.

Beat the eggs with botht he sugars until the sugar has almost dissolved and mixture turns creamy and a light beige colour.  Next, beat in the chocolate mixture.

Finally, beat in the chopped pecans.  Scrape this into the tin and bake for 25 minutes or until a poke with a toothpick through the sugary crust comes out barely clean, as the hot chocolate will cook on for at least 5 minutes after you've taken it out of the oven.

Recipe verdict: 9/10 ... "About the best brownie I've ever had, I'd say" - Matthew Smail, 21/3/2012.

Weight watchers point per slice - 9
leave to cool then cut into squares or bars with a sharp knife.

Woah there, noddy!

It's the morning after the day before!  Not involving alcohol (actually, it did, a half pint)... but it was finally my horse riding treat yesterday.

When I got up in the morning I felt really, really nervous and there were a few tears, but once Liz arrived at 12 and we were in the car the nerves started to go.  I think it was the infectious excitement from Liz.  Yvonne, who we were riding with (owns a stables) has ridden for years and is an old friend of Liz... they've not seen each other in over 20 years!

We got to the yard, signed a bunch of disclaimer forms and went off to stroke the horses.  I think having ten or fifteen minutes just around very steady horses and petting them started to put me at ease.  The yard was very much like the old riding school I learnt at, all the same sights and smells with the same friendly, enthusiastic people.

My pony (read horse) was bought out - he was pretty large, although not as big as Liz's horse.  He was called Moss and was to be my trusty steed for the hour hack.  I might add, at this point, that it was beautifully sunny, with a slight wind.  The stables was up high and overlooking the countryside between Harrogate and Leeds.  Stunning!

I managed to get on the horse without too much trouble, had the girth tightened, and did my own stirrup lengths (mistake, I was a notch too short but I managed!)

I think because Yvonne is a no nonsense woman, I was immediately at ease.  There was no time for nerves, we set off and within 10 minutes I was trotting.  My knees complained immediately, but it's amazing how quickly you remember all the leg / hand instructions.  On the main road for only 5 minutes, we were passed by a tractor.... normally a major issue for horses, but Moss was as steady as you like.  A bomb proof horse.  I immediately relaxed and the rest of the ride was a dream.  In and out of lanes, up and down hills.  Then Yvonne shouted from the front, as we got to a nice soft grounded climb up a hill, "Up for a canter?!"  ... "No" shouts Liz behind her... "YES!!!" I shout from behind Liz.... and off we went.  We had a brief stop half way up the hill and then back in to canter.  I gripped on to my novice strap around the horses neck, just for safety... but it felt total normal, easier than trot.  As we slowed back into a trot I told myself if we cantered again I'd sit down and push on like I used to.

A little more hacking, and then into an open, green field..... we all knew it was coming.  We lined up, sat down deep, and took off at a good canter.  I let didnt hold on to the strap.  I had my balance.  All of the joy of riding came rushing back to me, with none of the fear.  Moss was steady but quick!  He gave more to catch up as the two bigger horses left him a little.  As we got to the end of the field and slowed, I gave him a few big pats.

We walked / trotted the rest of the way home, chattering happily.  It's the first time I've had the joy of riding back, I've ridden a total of twice in the years since my last accident, and both times I was really nervous.  Once in South Africa, and once again in Doncaster.  This time it feels like I'd happily do it again.  And I think that Liz and I will make it a good few times a year together.  Liz had a great time too, and both of us can move this morning which is great.  Last time, in Doncaster, I couldn't walk for a week.  Because I've been to the gym lots and am a good deal fitter, I was much more ready to ride.

Once we were off the horses (after a picture was taken, which I will share once I get hold of it) we decided to all go to the pub (hence the half pint) - Yvonne said something which was probably throw away for her, but was nice for me - she could tell that I'd ridden in the past.  So I haven't forgotten everything.  I let the ladies catch up over what turned out to be 3 pints, and then escorted them home.

The most fun that I've had in ages, so a big thank you to Matt who paid for both of us to go as my weight loss treat and for the pints, as it turned out!!

I am off to get some bits for Matt's birthday on Friday now.  A happy bunny.

G out x

I can't get no.... *Ba ba baaaa*.... BURGER KING

The lack of immediate blog post weigh-in on Saturday was mostly down to the fact that, for the first time since I started my weight loss challenge in January, I put weight on last week (0.9kg)

I actually surprised myself with just how disappointed I was with that knowledge, but I wasn't surprised with my reaction to it.  It's a reaction that I know well, and for years has been a big part of the problem with my unhealthy relationship with food.  When I gain weight, my self esteem goes through the floor, and all I can think to do is comfort eat.  In my brain, in my world, everything HAS to be positive for it to work.  But it has to be positive in a certain way.  I'll give you some examples.  Same scenario, different spins....

So, imagine this as your scenario.  I am running on a tread mill.  I've run 2k so far, and I'm starting to hit my physical tiredness.  I'm at the gym with a friend, who sees that I'm struggling and says "Come on! You can run further than this!" in a bid to spur me on. 

That's me done.  Toys out of pram.  Off the treadmill, into the changing rooms and home.  Why?  Because the insinuation was that I am not reaching my potential.  Because they suggested that I'm not trying my hardest.  And I always turn up to everything like that.  It always has 100% of my available effort.  I immediately switch off if I don't succeed.  Basically, I'm a really really bad loser.

OK so back to the scenario.  This time the friend says "Wow you're doing really well!  Do you need to stop?  We can go if you like?" 

That's me on the treadmill for another 30 minutes.  Why?  Because my friend gave me the choice to continue or to go home, and reminded me that I'm doing well.  I'm encouraged and spurred on as a result.  I'm doing well!  Hey, I reckon I can do better than this.... if I go for another 30 minutes, think how much better I'll have done then!

I don't love exercise.  I love the feeling that I get after it, but it's not something that I relish doing.  It's a way for me to be able to eat more food whilst continuing to lose weight (HA!)  So imagine that reaction about ten fold, when you apply it to food, which is something that I really DO love!

When I get on the scales, and I've gained 0.9kg, if I get told that it's because I only went 2 out of 3 times to the gym but it's OK because I've done well, and think of all the weight loss I've managed, put it into perspective and try harder next week? 

KABOOOOOM!!!  Mental implosion.  Tears.  My brain fixes on the one thing that was negative.  That I didn't go to the gym enough.  I didn't try hard enough.  It was my failing.

Now imagine being poor, kind, loving Matthew.  Who just so happened to actually deliver the last line.
Poor soul.

At this point, as I repeatedly strop and think very seriously about immersing myself in a bath of McDonalds special sauce, while simultaneously ramming Big King burgers down my throat and drinking full ice-cream milkshakes, I realised that I've not beaten my demons.  And I don't think that I ever will.  I will NEVER be able to look at a bar of chocolate and see something I can have a little of.  I have a problem with controlling myself around food.  And the only reason why I have managed to maintain the success I have over the past few months, is because it has been just that.  Continued success.

This is the hardest part then.  When I have to rally, and make that success happen again.  I have had a bad weekend.  I have sulked, and eaten too much in a bid to steady my slightly injured soul.  But now I have to start again.  Forgive myself, and move forward.

I want to acknowledge the support of Matt and of my friends, predominantly on facebook, who were lovely and kind, and supportive just when I really did need it.  I know that this may seem melodramatic, but it feels like I'm on a battlefield and it's a war that I can only win with support.  I really want to win too. 

I would blog about the rest of my weekend, but it involved train spotting.  In an anorak.  So here are the photos.

G out x

An unlikely chance

I have neglected blogging the last month.  Not through any deliberate act, but through a complete lack of useful time.

So a quick update.... My parents visited Matt and I here in Leeds, which was cool.  We had them here for two nights, and managed to pack in some DIY (stopped the dogs from entering the upstairs rooms finally), a shopping trip, a visit to Kirkstall abbey, a drive out in Matt's car, and dinner at Salvo's in Leeds (very nice, but lots of naughty food and booze...) with Matt's mum too.

By the time Monday came around, I couldn't manage the gym, I was way too tired.  I managed to go on Wednesday, and Matt and I went for a run tonight up to Headingly and back.

As a result of our Salvo's visit, I started the week VERY much heavier than my weigh in result, and I don't think I will have lost any weight tomorrow.  In fact, I am sure that I will have gained.  But if it's only one week in 12, I will forgive myself.  I just won't have a treat night tomorrow night.

We are off to go on a steam train tomorrow, up to Howarth, which I am excited about.  There are real ale pubs along the route, which Matt is excited about.  It's what's known as a "win-win" situation.

I only have to go in to work for a half day on Monday, and then I have the rest of the week off.  My goodness I am looking forward to it!!! 

Matt is currently playing card games with an overly familiar American chap online.  I'm trying to decide if I should (a) watch the game and listen to them chatting, (b) repeatedly poke myself in the eye with a needle, or (c) go to bed.

G out x

All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us

Gandalf was a very wise character.  He seemed to have ample time to save the worlds and bring about the restoration of peace and the demise of Sauron with his band of friends.  But then, he had a giant eagle to give him lifts at his whim, and a beautiful white pony that he could call with ease and which ran with the wind.  I have a fiesta.  And no eagle.

So this week has been a long one.  I feel that I have been quiet, but that's mostly because I've spent all my waking hours up and moving, and not enough hours sleeping.  Last weekend was busy, and included illness, so by Monday I was worn out.  Add to that a week of sickness at work (not by me, by others but I have to cover) and my body still recovering, and two gym sessions, and two sparring sessions, and you have a VERY worn out G. 

My lovely, incredible, generally extremely thoughtful (most of the time) boyfriend went out this morning and did all the chores required and left me sleeping.  Oh my lord, I really needed it.  Which is why I do not begrudge him his time playing Battlefield 3 right now.  He has earnt it.  I even went out and bought him a little pie treat to say thank you - well, it is our treat day.  I had a Cadbury Creme Egg.  Nom nom nom!!

I lost a total of 1.4kg this week, which is one of my strongest losses.  I suspect possibly because I've been constantly moving but also because I've been poorly.  But the great news is that it pushes me over my 10% body weight target (half way point) so I'm thrilled!!  I'm now over half way in my weight loss challenge to myself, and have the sum total of 8.5kg left to lose before September.  I am now convinced that I will be able to achieve it.  I am starting to imagine what that day will feel like.  And also to have a look around for pretty dresses that Matty can buy for me as my treat.  Matt put in another strong performance this week, considering he was also ill last week.

We have friends over tonight for treat night and will be off to Sukathai once more, love that place!!  Tomorrow I intend to bake a sneaky cake and then get other people to eat it.  Then just one more week until my parents come for the weekend - yey!!  In fact, it's only two more weeks until I have a week off holiday.  I'd wish it here sooner but we have so much excitement between now and then that I daren't!!

Back to the original theme, though, of this particular entry in my blog.  I know that this is life, when your work is never done.  I know that we have made good steps this week to sort the house out and, for once, it is clean and tidy before the weekend.  I did a monumental amount of washing during the week to get on top of the serious backlog that had built up.  But I just cannot help but think we are actually a little TOO busy for my liking.  I think I am going to start to reserve a few weekends for just "nothing" - just to relax at home and catch up with hobbies etc.  Either that, or I'm going to employ a magical giant eagle and a king of ponies.

To be fair, the latter DOES sound quite exciting.  I wonder if they sell them on Amazon....

G out x

Good morning, beautiful, peaceful, wonderful.....KARBOOOOOMMM!!!!

I would, for a moment, like for you to picture a scene.  Imagine a long, restful night's sleep.  Imagine, at approximately 8.14am, a shuffling and movement of the mattress, and then again, another period of charming, well earned, deep sleep.  Then, as you begin to wake, the day is fighting to get into the room around the black out blind and the curtains.  Listen, if you will, to the following piece of music to help transport you to this sublime, blissful moment, as you realise that the day is still young, and you have not been woken by an alarm....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RM7cQCC4sU

...but you have, instead, been woken by the sound of bombs, gunfire, machine guns, tanks, gas stations exploding, and men co-ordinating their attack on B.  "Lads, lads...we've lost B.  Quick, get to A.... Spawn on me, I'm at C.... "

It's not the best start to the day, when you realise that your other half snuck out at 8.14am on a Sunday, not to have some sordid affair, or at the other end of the spectrum, to get you some kind of awesome surprise.  Nope, it's just because it's time that's wasted in bed when he could be gaming.

This weekend has been a busy one again.  To start the weekend off, I lost another 0.4kg, which I am very pleased with considering the skipping of two gym sessions owing to illness.  At 8am on Saturday (yes, Matt really DOES wake up at these times) Matt decided it would be a good idea to get up and go for a drive.  We managed to get out of the house by about 10am (I forget the delays, but there were some...car washing, bacon sandwich making, general Saturday morning chores) and on the road.  The idea was to go for a drive up to Ilkley Moor, and then back via Bradford to get me a riding hat.  We managed both, and I got some lovely photos.

While travelling along the above road, we managed to test the BMW suspension.  Matt hit a bump and the whole car jumped in the air.  I pretty much hit the roof.  The amusing part was that I was taking a picture at the time.  I think the photo says it all.  Part terror, part irritation, mostly in the air.

After that, we went to visit my Sheffield University friends in Sheffield, which was lovely!!  Great to see them all looking so well, and to see so many people come.  We spent the afternoon in the Riverside pub on Kelham Island.  My only regret is that we weren't able to stay longer.  I think one thing that I've missed for the time that I've been establishing myself in Leeds, or even in Doncaster, has been being surrounded by a bunch of friends who already know you well, and who you feel at ease with instantly.  No one is out to impress anyone else, and there are no internal politics to dodge, or anything work related.  It's just you, and your mates, hanging out.  I'm glad that I'm getting there now at home, but it was just so cool to see everyone and I can't wait for the next time. 

So to leave you with a funny tale sent from my brother on Saturday.  I received a text message saying "I just kept a cold caller on the line for 5 mins before hanging up on them.  They wanted to know if I had been injured in an accident so I concocted a story that I had lost a limb in a bizarre piano accident.  My favourite moment was when I asked him if musical injuries were on a sliding scale."  Classic.  I actually laughed out loud, in a queue of people (where I was standing at the time)

G out x

Horse riding booked!!!

I have a stinking cold.  Matt, on the other hand, has a serious case of man flu.  He still wanted to go for a drive tonight, but my theory is that it's definitely down time tonight.  We have decided that a gym trip when we're both poorly is a step too far.

Despite being poorly, I've had a good day.  Firstly, we have now booked a horse riding experience with one of Liz's old friends and Liz on the 20th March.  I am really looking forward to it!  I have bought some new chaps to go over my jods, which were on offer.  I am sure that I will hurt like hell after going, and I do hope that I stay on the horse, but I don't feel nervous yet which is good!

Another nice thing about today was that a lady at work asked me if I had lost weight, told me that she'd noticed and said how good I looked.  That made me smile from ear to ear.  I can obviously notice, but it's lovely that someone else is kind enough to notice too.

While I was clearing the back yard tonight and the sun was going down, I realised that I was pootling about at home.  And it really did feel like "home".  It is some time, possibly since I lived in Furneux, that I've really felt attached to anywhere.  Everywhere else has felt like someone else's place (probably because they were!) Matty and my home makes G happy.

G out x

Blogging from the car ftw

Well today has been extremely busy and a happy one for me AND Matt.

Firstly, I lost a strong 0.9kg this week which put me properly under my horse riding target. Whoop!! I am so pleased, particularly as this is the lightest that I have been in over two years.

Secondly, we set off early this morning travelling up to see a 335i (white with red leather) which Matt has bought. We should be able to pick it up on Tuesday-ish. So it will be bye bye to the mad little golf, which is likely to be put back to standard unless someone purchases it with mad modifications. Poor golfy.

We are currently sat in traffic at Elland Road (on our way to Doncaster and Matt accordingly forgot the Leeds game had just finished.) so we have been stuck in traffic for 40mins. I am therefore, using my app again.

Meal with friends tonight, and on our way to supply emergency Buttons supplies for Leah!!

Good day all round. Except the pork pie. Tasty, but naughty!!!

G out x

You know you're busy when...

You realise that you haven't cleaned the house in what seems an age.

Tonight, on our night off, we've spent half of it cleaning, and half of it Matt has spent playing multiplayer on Battlefield 3 with a friend.

I decided that cleaning was required, as, once again, we have a manic weekend coming up.  I am looking forward to not being the host though, and I gather we're in line for a three course meal on treat night which will be lovely I'm sure.  We are also off to see a car - I know not where, only that I am being taken along.  I know that the car is bigger than the current one, and designed to have more power, so I go along with it in the hope that it will be a less frightening passenger ride.  It is white and has red leather seats, so it will at least be pretty.

This week I have managed to swim a good deal, although every day my back is still giving me pain.  It's a whole lot better than it was, but I could do with it easing now. It's starting to get on my nerves.

Just two days until weigh in.  After two treat nights this week, as a result of Valentines day, I doubt very much that I'll lose any.  Matt cooked me a lovely three course meal for Valentines day.  It included a chocolate pudding.  Oh my lord........

Well, I think that it's time for bed.

G out x

Hurrah!!

Another loss this week - that's 6 weeks in a row!  I am now 300g off my first target, which will enable me to start horse riding again.  Yeah!!!  So a total loss of 0.6kg this week, and I'm really pleased.  If I carry on at this rate, I should definitely be at my goal weight by September.

My shape is definitely changing!  Today we went to Marks and Spencer (height of fashion) and I got some new bits and pieces - all smaller sizes.  Even my feet are smaller.  I had to get some new work shoes, as I've worn through another pair - and now I'm a size 6 1/2.  I used to be an 8 in most shops, including Marks!!  Matt tried on some suits, got flirted with by the man fitting him (and I got evils!!) and looks awesome.

Tonight we are off out which will be cool, and then we have a fairly busy day tomorrow. Looking forward to the rugby this afternoon :)

G out x

More ice and BMWs

So today I discovered two things.

Firstly, I discovered the reason why, in the beautiful sunshine on dry roads, BMW drivers have a reputation for driving like idiots.  Instantly, once behind the wheel, I revelled in the joy of people scooting out my way in terror, as the 3 series loomed up behind them.  I enjoyed the fact that when I put my foot down, the car booted me in the back from behind and took off with glee.  I loved the fact that the turbo responded with very little lag, and it turned into corners like it was on rails.  As I pulled up to my meeting, I got out of the car and realised that I'd driven over 100 miles and felt as fresh as a daisy.  I strode across the car park, feeling very self important.  Yes - yes, I was going to get myself one of these.  Why didn't more people drive them?!

Secondly, I discovered that 3 series BMWs are SH*T in the snow, freezing fog, sleet, freezing rain and black ice.  And terrifying.
I left my meeting in Leamington Spa, and bounced across the car park, leaping into my trusty pool car, looking forward to the drive home.  Snow was not forecast until later.  Then, a little south of Nottingham, the snow came.  I was on the M1, there were gritters out, it should have been OK.  The overhead signs were saying "SEVERE WEATHER WARNING: EXPECT DELAYS" - the first moment of terror.  The second moment of terror came, as I switched lanes.  I realised that the snow, which had now turned to sleet, was freezing on contact with the road, and I was driving at (a reduced) 60mph on sheets of ice.  As the lane change happened, the car slid all over the road.  Used to driving a front wheel drive car, I also corrected the slide incorrectly.  The weird sensation of having no traction at the front, and that I was no longer in charge of my own destiny, left me with an icy chill.  Seemly the entirity of the drivers on the M1 realised at the same time that the road we were travelling on was now a death trap, and everyone voluntarily slowed down to approximately 30mph.  We crawled along, watching the snow / sleet fall, and emergency vehicles tearing up and down both sides of the motorway, presumably going to rescue people who had realised too late.  This odd mixture of freezing conditions continued in varying degrees of seriousness, all the way to Sheffield, where it turned to rain.  Relieved, I put my foot down.  And a few miles later, drove into freezing fog.  By this time, my nerves shot, I considered stopping the beast that I was driving, finding a hotel, and just giving up.  I soldiered on, hearing Matty in my head - "Don't worry G, you're in Yorkshire now.  It's just a bit of snow.  It's only a bit of ice.  Be brave, G."  I gritted my teeth (literally) and carried on.  By the time I reached home, it was snowing again.  There is snow on my drive, and I have to be at work tomorrow for a management meeting.  I moan about my fiesta quite a lot.  It's not powerful enough, it's a go-cart etc etc.  But WHAT I would do to be trotting along in my little green goblin tomorrow, safe in the knowledge that I know the car, it pulls rather than pushes, and has some level of stability.

So, to conclude - BMWs are not winter cars, and are apparently useless in Yorkshire.

G out x

Deadliest catch, ice packs and BMWs

This evening, and tomorrow evening, Matt is once again away with work.  The price you pay for having a brilliant boyfriend is that other people demand his presence!

I am also in demand tomorrow, for a meeting in Warwickshire.  Pool car BMW 3 series?  Yes please, don't mind if I do.  The only issue being that I manage to finally get to play in a proper BMW just about the time of year when BMWs render themselves completely useless.  I can tell you that with absolute certainty, having seen many of them stuck / about to get stuck in the recent snow.  Still, the Fez is having a holiday, locked in her car park cage at work, and she deserves some time off and to rest her little hooves for a change.  Did I mention how comfortable that BMW is?  I've never understood why people prefer them for longer distances.  Now I know why.  Getting stuck in traffic earlier was not even the slightest bit stressful.

I've just been watching the Deadliest Catch.  Amazing how nail biting catching crabs can look!  I actually felt for them - working 30 hours in a row to pull in crab pots in -20c temperatures.  I hope they make some money with it!!!

Now it's Masterchef.  I'm not sure that I can continue watching, as I might be tempted to smash the TV is anyone makes a "jus" or a "foam" or anything else pretentious.  There is no doubt that these people are seriously good cooks, probably far better than I'll ever be, but I just wish that they'd make something brilliant that is actually possible.

Well, no gym for me tonight.  After back pain since Thursday night last week, I've managed a session on Friday, a swimming session on Monday and then real pain yesterday.  So tonight I have an ice pack on my back and am trying to move carefully.  Don't need to have pain tomorrow with a long drive times two, that would suck!!

So no Matty tomorrow either, but then doggies are being good for a change and the cat is waiting for lap space once I've finished typing.  Time to settle down for an hour or so before bed.

Miss my Matty.

G out x

Another week, another loss

So I lose an additional 0.5kg this week!  And what's special about that, you ask?  Well, that means that I've now lost over a stone!  I got my third weightwatchers milestone as well.  Happy days.

Last night I tried on a bunch of clothes that havent fitted me either at all, or at least not properly, for some time, and they all fitted.  Hooray!! My happiest moment was my Next trouser suit fitting.  It has never fitted me properly since I bought it.

Today, as a mini celebration, I have had a cream egg.  I figured it was better to have one now (5 weightwatchers points each) rather than resist for four weeks, and someone find me sat in a corner, covered in chocolate, surrounded by cream egg wrappers sobbing. 

Matt is home and playing Sega megadrive games on the TV.  He's currently playing Sensible soccer.  It really makes you realise just how far computer games have come!  It also reminds me that next time we clear the garage out, I shall be the one to "sort" the boxes that claim they are computer game related...  Oooh now he's on to another game that looks like this....

It's snowing, and has been for an hour or so.  Starting to settle now, as the ground is very cold.  We are hoping that it's just a shower as it's due to clear up by 9pm.  We are due out for dinner this evening so I hope that it does clear!  With my back as it is currently, I can't be skiing across Leeds!!
It's so cold today that even Matt is wearing a jumper.  I have on a pair of leggings, a pair of jeans, a tshirt, a hoody, a dressing gown and Norwegian slippers, and I'm still cold.  The dogs have got their coats on and are curled up together.

But outside is the poor squirrel....

G out x

Xbox-hater withdrawl syndrome

It's a dangerous thing, hanging on to hate.  Matt is away tonight, and with quiet, happy animals surrounding me, a warm cosy house, having been out on a walk with Liz and had a natter, everything seems normal and nice... but there's something missing.

But what is it?!  It has just dawned on me it's the missing low level irritation that comes with the Xbox being on.  The slight annoyance that I don't get to watch TV instead.  Well, now I AM watching TV, it doesn't seem so inviting.  Strange hey!!

I'm watching "Pushy & Proud - Pamper Parlour Mums" - twelve year olds going clubbing, getting dolled up, sitting in hot tubs together, talking about boys, having their hair and nails done... and the Mum's going "Oh, I have to let them do what they want, it's a sign of the times"
Well, if I ever have a daughter, she'll be locked up until she's 18 when she'll take up knitting and other wholesome pursuits. 

I managed a really good strong run yesterday at the gym, which was unfortunately followed by illness (too much too soon after eating) - so that's a lesson learnt.  No chilli within an hour of the gym!!  Another strong session required tomorrow.  I'd like to lose at least another 0.5kg this week, although again I feel like things are slow.

I miss Matty.  I'm looking forward to getting him home for the weekend.  It's lonely in Leeds on my own.

G out x

Assassin's trudge

I think even Matt is starting to realise that Assassin's Creed is a little repetitive.  It still has all of the good bits of the old game.  Getting to the point where Ezio is getting old, and the whole game is getting a little old with him.  The game seems to be heading in the direction of a final end.  Will this be the last of the ACs?  Who knows.

I do know that today was weigh in, and despite being utterly convinced that I'd lose nothing this week, I still lost 0.5kg.  I'm not displeased, but I'm not super pleased.  I guess I had to expect it to slow down at some point, and now I suspect will come the trudge of 1 - 2lb per week until my target.  Still, I've signed up for it, and it's working, so I may as well keep going!  Clothes are starting to fit that havent for some time, which is good!

Matt has been doing a large amount of what he calls "Beast mode" at the gym lately, and his arms are getting very solid.  He lost 1.5kg this week, which is excellent!!  Really proud of him!

I am in the process of cooking a chocolate marble tea loaf for pudding for dinner this evening.  We have Alex and Catherine coming over.  It smells tasty, so I hope it works out as it's the first time I've made one.  I, of course, shall have to have as little as possible.  I dont want to start another week behind after a weekend.

We (me and Liz) finally managed to cut down the remainder of Poppet's claws last night, so she can walk with ease and it doesnt cause her any fuss.  Finally sorted after a long time of being far too long for the poor animal!!  She seems much happier in herself as a result - dog nail clipping ftw!

Jim sent me his album in the post with a really amusing letter, asking me to check the vocals as usual.  I've had it on the afternoon and at first listen it sounds really accomplished!  I have the lyrics sheets to feedback to him with and a deadline.  It's like an exciting mini assignment!!  If you want to follow Jim on twitter, go to @JamesNighthawk - he has a really cool folky sound on this on, and you can link to his facebook and studio pages and have a listen - I believe that some of our duets are around somewhere so go and have a listen!   He's also a great producer if you're looking for one in the Herts/Essex area!

It has been a long week and I'm very tired - here's to a relaxed evening and rest of weekend!!

Off to clean and tidy now. 

G out x

Baby Monkey....baby Monkey..... Riding on a piiiiig baby monkey

God damn I need to get that song OUT of my head.  All day it has been stuck in there.

For those of you who haven't seen it, share my pain by clicking here

Wow, what a busy day!  On the face of it, it doesnt seem like it was that much to do but we've literally been non stop today!

Started the morning clearing out the garage.  It started as a quest to free two items to take to Marion and Richard, and ended up as a mission.  In the end, we cleared the whole thing and now we can actually fit a whole car in it! (not two, but baby steps!)  We've also finally listed on ebay the spare fish tank and the Welsh dresser in there, both of which take up a good deal of space.  Hopefully we'll get a sale for both and we'll gain some space but if not, we've not lost anything!

Then once we'd finished, we loaded a car load more stuff for the dump and in the process, broke a mirror.  Goodness me, what a disaster.  I really hope that it doesn't mean seven years bad luck!!

Then I cooked lunch and finished the washing, and Matt hoovered and tidied.

Once we'd tipped the rubbish after lunch, we did our weekly shop in Morrisons (we may have turned from Sainsbury, although they didnt have any Quorn mince.  Fail!) filled my car up with diesel and came home.  We sat down for 30 minutes, and then went up to Matt's Mum's house for dinner, which was delicious.  Then back home, and then straight back out for a walk with the dogs.

On our return, I listed the ebay listings etc and that's the end of a productive, but seemingly hectic day.

Shortly I shall be heading to bed after my chamomile tea.  Rock'n'roll, baby.

G out x

She packed her hopes and dreams, like a refugee

Weigh in today was unexpected - a loss of 1.6kg, which is much higher than I anticipated.  It means that today I got my second weight watchers "star" - a 5% body fat loss!  Hooray!

In celebration, we are going to go out to have Thai for our treat night tonight, to the local restaurant called Sala Thai.  Very nice from memory, as we went their for Catherine's birthday. 
http://www.salathaileeds.co.uk/ if you're interested!

In the interim, I've decided to settle myself down for a rest.  We've already been to the gym today and I managed a 600 calorie burn, just over an hour's cardio.  My knee is grumbling a little as usual, but a good deal less than it has done of late, and my calves feel like they need a rest.  In fact they're sore to the touch.  So no gym until Monday now. 

Currently, I am sat in our living room, on the sofa, with my feet up on the stool, listening to the Eagles and writing this.  It occured to me what a beautiful song "The Last Resort" is again, I always forget until I hear it.  It seems to resonate with me strongly, I suppose as a result of the upping sticks and disappearing off to a foreign land (otherwise known as Yorkshire) - granted I've not laid waste to my surrounds, got high in the town or generally oppressed an entire race of people.  I think what I am saying is that it has left me in a reflective mood.

Two years ago, if someone had said to me that I'd be living in Leeds with my wonderful other half, in a beautiful house, with a job that I really enjoy and feeling so good about myself and our lives in general, I really just wouldnt have believed it.  It would have been just too good to be true.  I think that sometimes I forget just how happy I am, and just how unhappy I have been.  I really don't celebrate how happy I am enough.  I must never take it for granted, and never be afraid that I might lose it.  These must be the best years of my life and I must enjoy them, because I cannot dare to hope that they will be better than this.

Sniffle, sniffle.  Silly song.

I suppose I'm also in a great mood because I've booked our flights out to see Mum and Dad, and I'm really looking forward to it already!  Granted I'll see them in March, and we'll get to take them out to one of our favourite restaurants and they can stay with us a little longer this time which is much more satisfactory, but when we go out to them it feels like a real holiday.  And I get to practice my failing French!!

G out x

Ryanair... REALLY?!?!

So it's Friday.  And it's payday.  Usually an extremely good combination, I must say.  Particularly as my little bonus came through too.  After all bills paid, I have about £30.  And I've just been interacting with Ryanair.

You understand, that I was driven to this course of action because Matty is playing on the Xbox.  It's Assassin's creed again tonight, which is a good deal more preferable than the majority of games in the arsenal.  Mostly knife / blade kills, no bullet noise in this particular part of the game.  A love of climbing up tall buildings and then throwing the character off.  You know, day to day routines.

Back to Ryanair then.  The last time I flew with them, I swore solemnly that it would be the last.  The insistance on charging for every little detail is infuriating.  They are one of two companies going from Leeds / Bradford to Limoges, our chosen destination for a summer parental visit.  Jet2 is a far superior airline, but at first glance seemed a good deal more expensive.  So I chose my flights for me and Matt, and it came to £200.  Deal!  Select a bag?  Well, we chose one between us, £70 extra.  I navigated my way through the various different promotions, remembering each time that Ryanair insists on you clicking "no" and then stopping you, unticking itself and repeatedly asking you to re-select.  I assume this is born from the idea that eventually it becomes so frustrating that you GET the damn travel insurance, car hire, bags, text messages, extra blood and a skateboarding badger JUST to shut it up.  By the time I'd finished, the journey was £300.  OK.... I can live with that.   Click!!  Ooops, sorry.  You've taken too long.  Ejected to the front screen.  Start again.

Now I'm a patient woman.  I'm well known for it.  Famed for it.  I seem to have more patience than Mother Teressa herself did, in many situations.  But I'm close to snapping now.  Click, click, click ... a few well placed mutterings and expletives.... click click click... Done.  Same flights.  £300.
So how would I like to pay?  Mastercard please!  OK madam, we'd like another £24 then please.  Admin fee each way.

ADMIN FEE OF £24?!?!  Have I been taking crack, or has the world gone mad?!?!  I bet if I went down to the Ryanair head office and personally gave them a pile of cash, they'd charge me for wiping my feet at the door, the 12 paces up to the desk, 1 assault charge, a counting charge, a banking charge and letting me open the door for myself on the way out.  That'll be another £64 pounds please madam.

Deep breaths....

So on a lighter note, we had chilli for dinner.  I made it with the Scotch Bonnet chilli which was purchased from Morrisons last Saturday.  Good Lord, it's a hot chilli.  While stirring the food, the smell of it gave me a coughing fit and then a sneezing fit.  The cat collapsed and waved his legs in the air in submission.  Matt ran into the kitchen, rescued the cat and in the process set off his asthma.  The funny thing is, I'm not exaggerating THAT much!  A lot of yoghurt (soya) later, it was edible.  Just.

Weight wise, I've not had a good week.  I dont think I'm going to lose all that much.  I've tried very hard, and not eaten anything bad, done all of my weight watchers and been to the gym several times.  I'm not disheartened too much though, as today I discovered I've lost 2inches from my waist, 2 from my hips and various other places.  I feel slimmer and on my way, and I actually feel a good deal healthier.  I sat opposite piles of naughty food today (office birthday) and didnt touch a piece.  That would have never happened before.

Well, I'm now back off to look at holidays in Mexico and laser eye surgery.

G out x

Fishies galore...

Well, no Xbox this evening as Matt is away with work.  I'm trying to fill my evening with as many terrible TV shows as possible, to get my fix!  Later I intend to treat myself to an early night with a book.

That's rock'n'roll, baby!!!

Tonight when I got home (and talked myself out of going back out in the cold to the gym!) I noticed that both Lenny AND Nimoy were out in the tank and swimming about.  Forgive the algae, as the tank is due a clean shortly, but Lenny is looking very impressive now!

(for those of you who don't know them, Nimoy is the red tailed black shark, Lenny is the tiger.)  I love these fish, they're so gorgeous.  It's awesome to make a cup of tea and see these two monsters just cruisin' 'round ma tank, keepin' it real.

So I've decided that I have to do SOME kind of exercise this evening, and that means breaking out my Davina fit video to prance around to.  It will also require sofa movement and probably scare the dogs silly.  I shall have to be careful because if I cause too many vibrations in the living room, I may break the Xbox......

;)

G out x

Ps.  G is missing Matty loads.  I'd even prefer him to be here playing Xbox. xxx

THIS IS ALPHA TEAM, SURPRESSING ENEMY POSITION!!!

Oh no, wait.  This is not alpha team surpressing enemy position, this is geek town, being assaulted by mid twenty something men who have been fed and now want to "shoot" things without any consequence to human life.  And yes, the silly man in charge is still shouting swear words.

I'm regretting my pizza on Saturday.  I think it may have messed up my decent weight loss chance on this particular occasion.  But it's OK.  At work today I got told that they could tell I'd lost weight, because they could no longer see my VPL.  Ah lovely.  Confidence blow for the win.

So this evening is gym night again.  But before that, while Matt plays his online game with his pals, I'm trying to amuse myself with a DS (Mario.... I remember why I don't play it now.  Because I'm SERIOUSLY rubbish at it, and as a result it's the most frustrating thing ever.  Like, more frustrating than Rock Band) and with the Kindle (not enough light, no batteries for my book light).  Consequently, I am writing my blog again.

Did anyone else notice how flipping cold it is?!  I'm not built for this weather.  I should be on a sunny beach somewhere.

Oooh good, they're bugging out.... oh no, weapon jam.  What do we do?!?!  Quick someone, flank them. Argh hang on, stop shooting, they're friendly.  Oh god, the humanity.

G out x

War is bad, M'KAY....

Following our gym session, which left me looking like an exhausted beetroot that had been left out in the sun too long, and left me hobbling around on already stiff legs, I made us some lunch (more points than I meant to, but I was so hungry!!) and then settled on the sofa.

Matt bought a keyboard for Rock Band 3 and then, post shower, he tricked me into playing on the Xbox...  The keyboard was too tempting, plus the fact that he was rubbish at it awakened my inner overly-competitive beast.  Unbeknown to me, as I thumped away at the keys, concentrating intently on the content flying towards me on the screen, and berating Matt and the cat for distracting me and causing missed notes, Matt snapped a picture of me.  Oh the shame!  Caught in the act...

Incidently, for those of you that may believe I'm scared, I'm not.  That's just the face I pull when I'm concentrating.

A busy rest of day, we're off out for coffee shortly and then up to a friends this evening.  I'm toying with the idea of having a "treat" night and ordering a pizza, and reintroducing bread this week.  But it's a LOT of points (approx. 30) for a pizza hut pizza, which would mean blowing all my weekly points in one go.  It'd equate to three gym sessions and two walks.  When you're putting in so much effort, a treat doesn't really feel like so much of a treat!!

Matt and Stu are now (remotely) playing a war game, I believe it's Flashpoint.  There's a chap doing some kind of commentary on it, and frankly, he's offensive.  His potty mouth is intense, and it's pretty difficult to think over the noise of intense gun fire and swear words.  Add to that the fact that death seems no real object for these super human warriers, and all that they have to do when they're shot repeatedly is duck behind some cover and get more health, or grab a health pack out of a bag and magically start running again, and it makes for an incredibly irritating passenger experience.

I never thought I'd say it.... but bring back Skyrim.

G out. x

More good news!!

Well, I expected week two weight loss to fall away a bit but actually it has remained pretty strong!!  I lost 1.6kg this week, taking my combined loss to 4.2kg, or just over 9llbs.  I am so pleased!!  I should imagine the next bit will be harder, as I'm back to previous plateau weight and it'll take some effort to push below that!

Today we are off out to the gym.  It's freezing outside (or at least I'm told so, I'm still under a duvet, Matt has gone into town to get his crap shoes from Jones refunded) Gym is at 11am so I'm only really quickly typing up my achievement before hitting the gym.  Matt and Stu will be training together today (Man training, still ache from trying it on Wednesday) so I shall be plodding along on a treadmill on my own, but that's OK.  Fewer people see me *glowing* that way!!  I wonder if the New Year gym influx has calmed yet or if it'll be rammed again today.

I still havent decided what I reintroduce food wise today.  The first week I'd have killed for a tea with milk, but actually black tea and coffee have become fairly normal and I'm not all that fussed.  In fact, I'm tempted to carry on with none of the aggitants because I've felt so much less poorly the last few weeks.  I've been able to focus and get stuff done without constantly worrying about what my stomach will do next.  I can't recommend FODMAP diet enough to IBS sufferers.  It really is incredible, and actually if you do enough research, there are lots of tasty meals to be had!

G out x

No Xbox for several days...

I think that Matt might be ill.  This week he seems to have wanted to go to work, go to the gym, watch TV and catch up on a few films.  He even just went for a run in the freezing cold prior to a dog walk.  Impressive!!

Tomorrow is weigh in number two.  I've worked really hard again this week on my food intake, nothing unhealthy has passed my lips.  I've done two reasonable gym sessions and a walk.  I hope that I have some reasonable success again!  The other good news is that my stomach has been about 60% better than over Christmas so I have definitely cut out one or more foods that was causing the majority of the problem.  This week coming I will get to reintroduce a food if I so wish.  I cannot decide what I shall put back in.... should it be milk, bread, or onion?

Gym during the day tomorrow and then we're off to a friend's house in the evening, and I think coffee along the way.  Eye appointment on Sunday - I think that they might notice my prescription requires changing.  Shame!

Watching the film Limitless at this moment in time.  It's quite entertaining in a bad kind of way.  I'm wondering if it's about to get interesting...  One can only hope.

G out x