It's a dangerous thing, hanging on to hate. Matt is away tonight, and with quiet, happy animals surrounding me, a warm cosy house, having been out on a walk with Liz and had a natter, everything seems normal and nice... but there's something missing.
But what is it?! It has just dawned on me it's the missing low level irritation that comes with the Xbox being on. The slight annoyance that I don't get to watch TV instead. Well, now I AM watching TV, it doesn't seem so inviting. Strange hey!!
I'm watching "Pushy & Proud - Pamper Parlour Mums" - twelve year olds going clubbing, getting dolled up, sitting in hot tubs together, talking about boys, having their hair and nails done... and the Mum's going "Oh, I have to let them do what they want, it's a sign of the times"
Well, if I ever have a daughter, she'll be locked up until she's 18 when she'll take up knitting and other wholesome pursuits.
I managed a really good strong run yesterday at the gym, which was unfortunately followed by illness (too much too soon after eating) - so that's a lesson learnt. No chilli within an hour of the gym!! Another strong session required tomorrow. I'd like to lose at least another 0.5kg this week, although again I feel like things are slow.
I miss Matty. I'm looking forward to getting him home for the weekend. It's lonely in Leeds on my own.
G out x
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